A WOMAN'S OBSESSION.

 A WOMAN'S OBSESSION.

Every women are obsessed with whatever they loved be it human or material things.

A man should know this and know peace.

Majorly, men do not think like women. Only a very few women think like a man and we have seen them in the society yet, the traces of that obsessive trait is seen in them.

I'm writing this short piece because of some absolute relationship position I have been reading online about women obsession and I need to drop my own experience and concept of women obsession. 

Know this that a woman that loves you as a man is obsessed with you. She will go all length not only to have you as the husband but also to protect you but this obsession dies with child bearing as the marriage grows older.

Every man must train himself to absorb the pressure of a woman obsessive exuberance. It is there naturally. If a woman is not obsessed about that love, the love is shaky. You can't kill a woman's obsessive emotion with nagging and being forceful pressing down her throat with your expectation.

If you are not mentally ripe for marriage, don't go into it. When you establish a relationship with a woman, study her to know the areas you will correct in her life.

When I met my wife in the University, my first assignment was to study her to know her various weaknesses and the need to make correction.

The first thing I did was to change her mobile lines and disconnected her from some friends. I did this because I observed her kind of conversation for a long time and the kind of people she engaged in conversation. Your association also greatly affect your relationship. 

So, men should not neglect this observations and signs whilst planning to build a home.

You the man is the one that will love, a woman will be obsessed. That's their own kind of love. 

Till my University days, I still loved food a lot. She tried all her best but she couldn't satisfy my food taste so,I saw that as a weakness. I wanted to know why and I started asking her questions relating to food making in their home. I discovered she doesn't do anything kitchen at home as the last born,so, I taught her several of the dishes she prepare now and I'm still satisfied with how far she does it till date.

My wife doesn't eat next day food and I blend with it. I'm the one that loves next day food. 

Once my wife leaves the kitchen, she won't go back there. Whatever you want as at the time of the food preparation ask for it. It is not wickedness. As such,after her kitchen activities, I'm the one that always end up going up and down till date. I believe that, when I'm old, our house help will take over my up and down movement the kitchen but for now,in the last 15years, we have never had a house help.

My wife and I have different understanding to issues especially that bothering on opposite sex. Since I had done my first assignment of assessment before settling with her,I'm hardly bothered or suspicious of her as such, my constant monitoring of her is nonverbal communication like body language. I know virtually all her friends ,male and female. 

For 7years of our marriage, we both had access to our various phones and that created a lot of chaos in our homes. One she doesn't like my social interaction approach with opposite sex. She knows I'm kind hearted and susceptible to falling to temptation by her own understanding and I knew she was being protective still most time, such engagement leads to quarrel so, in the last 8yrs, everyone has faced his or her phone private and there's peace.

So, stop monitoring your partners phones up and down looking for what is not lost. Learn to read him or her without accessing his private device. Endeavour to train yourself to that level and don't use suspicions to destroy your home.

As a man let me tell you this, know your woman to a level that she will tell you everything! If not all, 99%✓. It saves the home a lot and build trust. My wife tells me everything including those who attempt wooing her, promising her money, introducing her to men, admiring her backside, lecturers disturbing her etc and in several cases she showed me the people and she would go all out to greet the person and I would read the body language ,expression and countenances of the person. I even help her to greet the person properly in the case of an elderly person. 

You are the one that will live the entire of your life with your wife not family members. Know yourselves first and stop attaching family emotions into your own lives but relate with understanding.

In every home, there are rules of engagement and anyone who comes in with the intention of breaking those rules should never be tolerated.

Be respectful to families and humble whilst extending love by way of resilience, endurance and perseverence to anything contrary to the vow you take with your wife and or husband but you must give time frame to all those things as it shouldn't be forever. This is your own home. Everything that will destroy it must be rejected!

Don't belittle your home. Honour it! Endure things together,plan together and be contented living within your means whilst working hard to avoid unnecessary pressure.

She has been exceptional in so many areas that I won't say here for confidential reasons.

You can't give what you don't have yet,no one is an island of knowledge.

God won't come down to help us!

Akande Akin Sanyaolu

23rd December,2023.